I truly didn't think that this was even possible. For a woman who is capable of writing for 12-15 hours a day, a writer who is commonly told by editors, "It is great but you have to cut it down some. It is just too LONG." I have been given the gift of gab as they say. That gift in my case flows right through my fingertips and on to the screen in the form of this blog and its correlating Facebook page. What has me baffled is that today and for some time now, I literally have nothing to say. I am in the worst case of writer’s block that I have ever experienced.
It seems that all I want to do lately is READ. I don’t want to be the one actually doing the writing. I want to be the one reading what other people have written. Oh sure, I have all of these wonderful ideas about topics that I could write about… “How being chronically ill is a full time job”… “How you should not blame yourself for becoming sick”… “How to use this time to learn a new skill”… blahblahblah. Does any of it ever turn into a post on this blog? Nope, Nada, Zilch. I got nothing.
I started this blog with the intention of giving emotional support to those who are suffering with chronic illness, considering I have been battling Chronic Lyme Disease for three years. Now it seems that I am in a rut myself. I think it is because I am tired of talking about being sick right now. Sometimes when we are trying to get better, it only holds us back if we are constantly talking about what it feels like to be sick all the time. I am climbing up the steep hill, once again, with a new protocol, new meds, a new doctor and a new mindset…trying to fight this damn disease. I don’t want to lament about how awful it is to be sick anymore.
So, maybe I will write some posts that have nothing to do with chronic illness for a while and see how that goes. I might mention my illness a little bit or I might lend you some advice every now and then about Chronic Lyme Disease because I can’t totally avoid the elephant in the room but the next few posts are probably going to stray from the “chronic illness” format. Feel free to ask me questions or make suggestions for topics because that would be really helpful right now.
Otherwise, there isn’t much to tell in the world of writer’s block. Stay tuned because I really have no idea what my next post will be about. It should be interesting…